Marriage--Is it Important?

Short answer? Society says "Yes"

Going through a divorce can dampen anyone's view on marriage, so why are we often like moth's to a flame when it comes to relationships and marriage?

SO Many Questions

Speaking to a plethora of family and friends (single and married) made me realize that people, in general, have an innate desire to be in a committed relationship and share their lives with another person in an intimate and loving way. But the question still remained..."But why?" Is marriage only important to religious individuals or those that want to reap the financial benefits of sharing a marriage certificate? Is it important to every human being? Do we have an unexplained desire to find “our person” and commit to them legally according to the laws of the land or in the eyes of God?

"Institutions" Are For Prisoners And Mental Patients

I realized that my answer to these questions was, “I don't know!” Having gone through a divorce, I feel it’s safe to say that I’m slightly jaded when it comes to the institution of marriage. On a side note, I have a friend who despises the phrase, “the institution of marriage”. When he thinks of institutions, he imagines prisons or mental hospitals—two very interesting things to equate with marriage, I might add.

The majority of my divorced friends carry cynicism in their hearts towards marriage as well. Perhaps this is a way to protect our hearts from getting hurt again? Or at least married and divorced again?

Is It In Our DNA?

Despite the risks that go along with marriage, it is an institution that is essential to our society. A quote found in the Supreme Court Ruling on Marriage states, “The centrality of marriage to the human condition makes it unsurprising that the institution has existed for millennia and across civilizations. Since the dawn of history, marriage has transformed strangers into relatives, binding families and societies together.” The majority of individuals believe in marriage—it has been around for millennia, so perhaps it’s in our DNA. Something within us yearns to find our “person”, and for many people, once that person is "found" marriage is the natural next step.

There are a few things I DO know about marriage:

1. Marriage is a Divine Institution: When entered into properly, marriage can provide safety, acceptance, security and of course, love.

I’ve come to know this from my personal experiences as a Christian. Marriage is central to God’s plan for us—for so many reasons. I’ve also seen each of my 4 siblings maintain a loving, happy marriage (each are not without their struggles!) so I know it’s possible!

2. Marriage is a Petri-Dish: Marriage offers the perfect “breeding ground” for improvement and growth!

What other relationship allows two people the opportunity to smooth out their rough edges and give of themselves continually? (besides parenting) I’ve learned this from my own experiences in marriage—I’ve never been required to stretch so far out of my comfort zone, or give of myself than I did in my marriage.

3. Marriage is Important: Because marriage has been an important part of our society since the beginning, so much of who we are is based upon successful marriages.

Children thrive in homes where strong marriages abide, and who doesn’t want what’s best for the children? In the words of Whitney Houston, “…children are our future…” Many studies have been done on how marriages and divorces impact children.

Marriage Is Like Money

Regardless of our belief in marriage, or if we think marriage is nothing but a piece of paper, there is no denying the value this relationship holds in our society. Money is simply a piece of paper that the government has told us is valuable, but those pieces of paper represent something important. So much of our society depends on those symbolic pieces of paper. Similar to money, marriage may simply be a piece of paper, but the value and meaning behind that piece of paper represents love, commitment and respect—all things that are valuable to those who hold it—and essential to a functional society.

References:

http://www.supremecourt.gov/opinions/14pdf/14-556_3204.pdfCollage